Sun 10 Aug 2008
From Tim Shipman:
Craig Ferguson: “Barack Obama was in Germany” today, and “he did this speech and 100,000 people showed up. There were so many Germans shouting and screaming that France…surrendered just in case.”
Jimmy Kimmel: “They really love Barack Obama in Germany. He’s like a rock star over there. Impressive until you realize that David Hasselhoff is also like a rock star over there.”
David Letterman: Signs Barack Obama Is Overconfident.
Proposed bill to change Oklahoma to ‘Oklabama.’
Offered Bush 20 bucks for the ‘Mission Accomplished’ banner.
Asked guy at Staples, ‘Which chair will work best in an oval-shaped office?’
Having head measured for Mount Rushmore.
Offered McCain a job in gift shop at Obama Presidential Library.
Jay Leno: “Of course, Obama’s supporters got him his usual birthday gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.”
Jay Leno: “Obama’s people are trying to portray McCain as cranky, and McCain is trying to portray Obama as arrogant, you see. And when Obama was asked what he thought about being called arrogant, well, he said he was ‘above having to answer that question.’”
Jay Leno: “See Barack Obama on the news? He’s becoming a workout fanatic. He’s at the gym, like, twice a day, sometimes three times a day at the gym, yeah, according to his staff. Well, he has to stay in shape to do those flip-flops.”
Jay Leno: “Barack Obama back from his big European tour. Did you see him in Europe? People were cheering him, holding up signs, blowing him kisses. And that was just the American media covering the story.”
H/T: Lucianne’s News Forum Home Page
